Loss, Grief, and Support

Grief is spiritual. We are spiritual beings in a physical experience; because we are spiritual beings, we genuinely love and experience grief. I have engaged with people who do not feel grief. That experience is alarming for those of us capable of grief. It is healthy to grieve. It must bring us into our empathy and gathering to make meaning out of grief and loss. In the physical experience, everything that lives also dies. Not everything that lives Loves. Not everything that lives, Grieves. Grief brings us to a deep level of meaning-making and challenge.
Understanding the past is the key to moving into a different future for some. Some people want the past and the future to be seamless without fundamental changes in the basics. Something may happen in their life that they wish to process and move through so they can feel better. For many, loss brings so much grief we can feel we are completely detached from the progression of our life up until that point. Loss can be unexpected and catastrophic.

You may not understand its impact if you have not experienced this kind of loss. You might have empathy and try to understand, but you can not understand what another person is feeling. The impact is so pervasive on the energy and emotional systems that it can ultimately impact the physical and the spiritual. The entire system of the person is called into challenge, and the thinking of the person needs to be silent, or the thinking can completely “go negative” and even be a danger to the person’s well-being and survival.

This kind of “irrational” thought includes a sense of guilt and shame because the loss was not avoided. People feel loss and shame related to the virus and also the shots. People were taken to hospitals, families were “locked out,” and their loved ones died without the love and support of family. Those who lose their children, their soul mates, and the people they were entirely emotionally attached to are struggling to make meaning out of this when it is completely different from anything they were prepared for. It did not fit with the “normal” expectations about loss. We usually expect to be together, to have the support and emotional understanding to go through our losses.

As a therapist for many years, I realized the lack of emotional support impacts every level of a person’s being. We become ungrounded, detached from our moorings when we lack support and are unable to be held in our grief. Guilt, Anger, Fear, and Sadness flood the system, and grounding is impacted. Thinking while flooded with feelings is always a mistake.
That is why support is so important—helping the person feel loved and held so they can feel what they need to feel and suspend thinking for a while and giving that function to trusted and supportive people. This allows a period of respite to go through the restoration of the heart and energy field necessary for survival.

Many do not survive grief. They shut down and become dead people no longer energetically invested in their lives and being. Spiritually, they have detached. On some level, there is a decision made to disengage. This will eventually impact health and healing on every level of being.

I am calling an alarm! We are under a catastrophic challenge as a society. We need to support and listen to what is happening around us. We have learned to get our information from the “news” or “TV,” but we need to turn those systems off and engage neighbors to exchange information about what is happening. Wake up, Get Up, and FIND OUT!